Um, Wow

Location: Salem
Mood: aggravated

I had an interview today. It’s not the first interview since my last installment, but it’s the first worth saying anything about. (The last went okay).

This is for a professional therapeutic company that shall remain nameless. I applied for some open positions that I found online. I got VERY LITTLE information about the position and the company. However, my application for a Residential Counselor got pushed through, and I was asked to come in and meet with the associate director (a woman named Tami). I set up the interview a week ahead of time. Then I attempted to learn what I could about the organization in order to prepare myself.

I couldn’t find anything.

So, at this point I’m thinking this interview could go several different ways. It could be a residential counselor for nutbars, or it could be really interesting and not at all scary. It could be a glorified ass-wiper, or it could be just what I need. No idea.

I wake up this morning, and I have a freaking rash on my face! It was around my mouth (and no I didn’t do anything pervy to get it), so it’s right where you can’t hide it and the interviewer is going to be looking. So, that’s a great start to my day. I’m already apprehensive about what this job even is, and now I’ve got rash-mouth. I’m thinking I’m going to be SUPER impressive (in case you can’t tell, I’m being SARCASTIC).

The interview is in Salem, so I left two hours early. This gives me about 45 minutes to get lost and find the place. On the way down I thought I was getting pulled over two different times. Luckily I only THOUGHT I was getting pulled over, and the cops drove right past me. I’ve never been pulled over though, and this causes my heart rate to sky rocket. So, I’m nervous and freaking out.

When I arrive in Salem, Gloria PeuterSchmidt decides to go all weirdo on me and tell me to turn left when she clearly meant right...twice. When I finally got myself in the right direction (I’m not even sure how I figured out that she was tricking me), I drove right past a gas station and she says “You have arrived.”....
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At a gas station? Um, Gloria, no way in hell did I just drive down to Salem to interview at a freaking Arco! Of course, this is an area of town that is one-way streets only. So, I wind up driving around the block about 1500 times. Finally I decide to call the place. So I pull over and look at my notes to get the phone number.

Yeah, I didn’t write a number down (let this be a lesson to anyone who ever finds themselves in my position). It’s now 12:55 and my interview is at 1pm. I know I have some email correspondences with a woman who works here. So I call home to have someone check my email for me.

No answer.
I call my mom’s cell phone.
No answer.
Dad, no answer. Sean’s out delivering food for the YMCA or something.

I tried calling my sister, but I thought this was a long shot because she never answers her phone. One ring later Amber answers her phone! She’s sitting at her computer! So she logs into my G-mail, finds out I’m at the right place, and gets the number for me. THANK GOD FOR AMBER!!!

Turns out Gloria kept telling me the building was on the right hand side of the road when it was actually on the left. Needless to say, Gloria and I are not exactly speaking right now.

I got there at 5 after 1, and had a nice little chat with the receptionist. Then two guys come to get me. I guess I’m not interviewing with this Tami woman. I’m interviewing with two guys, and one of them is VERY attractive.

So, here I am at this interview for a job I know nothing about, sitting across from a full on hotty, and I’ve got a freaking rash on my face!

They tell me about the job. I guess it involves helping sexually aggressive males. Yikes! Now I’m thoroughly frightened, but I listen hoping it gets better. It does, but not much. The pay is VERY little considering what they ask of you. If I’m offered it, I’ll probably have to turn it down because the pay doesn’t justify relocating to Salem.

One of these days I’ll find the perfect job.